Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Elf on the Shelf: How I am Overcoming My Phobia for the Sake of My Children

"I am going to murder you...tehehehe."

My introduction to The Elf on the Shelf came when we received the thing for a present. I had no idea what it was. As my mother-in-law explained to Eldest that the elf would keep an eye on his behavior and report to Santa nightly, I examined the drawing of an adorable elf on the box. Then I opened the cover to find the freakiest damn thing I had ever seen.

Swallowing a scream, I slammed the lid closed and threw the satanic creature away from me. (In my defense, I tried to chuck it across the room in the most grateful way possible.)  Luckily, Christmas had passed and we were able to tuck the box away in the basement. I had an entire year for Eldest to forget about the tradition I had hoped to never start. And he did…for a while.